NO

. Still no.

Maybe you should get that way. He’s hot!

I don’t reply. I do get on Twitter and search Memphis.

@thelocofamily tweets @stdrock1 MB, she’s not your type. #rockmebaby #foreversteel

@clofton1 tweets @stdrock1 MB #rockerbabyonboard gimme 1! #foreversteel

@m_migliaccio tweets @stdrock1 MB, is she even from #jerseyshore?! #foreversteel

@ TE1998 tweets @stdrock1 MB, you + me = screaming O, not screaming baby. #foreversteel

@michelledrew962 tweets @stdrock1 MB, I’ll rock you regardless! #foreversteel

Pregnant! Dear Lord. Memphis, you ass! Thank God my mother doesn’t have Twitter. I wonder if his mom does.

I keep reading through the feed.

@nikkirives1 tweets @stdrock1 MB, YOU ARE SO NOT @ZacEfron … but you are hot. I’d swallow. #foreversteel

@triciaann322 replies under the thread

@stdrock1 MB, even hotter than him. I’d try anal. #callme #foreversteel

@mischellyb tweets @stdrock1 MB, my pussy, ur face.

@lita08 tweets @stdrock1 MB, saw you at LIV. #yourockedhisface Get well dome <3 #foreversteel

@Jeana05816262 tweets @stdrock1 MB, #getwelldome hahahahaha #imin #foreversteel

@DannielleJeffer tweets @stdrock1 MB, Get well <3 #foreversteel

@ ttantonelli tweets @stdrock1 MB, is the news true? If yes, give me one night before baby. #justonenight #foreversteel

The bedroom door opens and Memphis walks in, locking it behind him.

“What are you doing?”

“The guys convinced Mom and Mads to go out on the boat.” He smirks. “I just took a pill, so I was gonna try to convince you to do a little—”

I hold up the phone. “Do you know what they’re saying?” That makes him stop.

“Who?”

“Your gaggle of groupies on social media.”

He sits down next to me. “Haven’t been on since you got here.” He runs his hand through his hair before he takes the phone and looks at it, “Oh, wow, I’m having a baby, and I am hotter than Zac Efron. Not bad.” He laughs. “No pictures, that’s a plus if that’s what you’re worried about it.”

I take it and scroll through. “At jamiesexton1 posted a picture … of her panties.” I shake my head. “She says ‘no STDs, but my panties are soaked’.”

“Is that so?” He laughs.

“And @lizziestevens wants four STDs at once.”

“She’s not fucking around, huh? Just going for it.” He takes the phone and throws it on the bed, then kisses me.

Soft, wet, and urgent lips cover mine. He sucks on my lower lip, then runs his tongue across mine.

“I’m not gonna try to fuck you, Tales,” he says as he holds my bottom lip between his teeth. “Just wanna do some of this and talk.”

“Mmm-hmm,” I moan.

He pushes against me with his chest so I am lying down on my back, and he is holding himself up with one arm.

After he explores my mouth with his tongue and ignites that part of me that only he has, I pull back and push against his chest.

“How about you lie down?”

His eyes are dopey and his smile is sloppy, but he is beautiful and makes me—for the first time in my life—feel that I am, too.

“You think you can keep me down?”

“Wouldn’t want to.” I kiss him as I turn him so he is the one lying down.

“No?” I shake my head from side to side. “Why not, sweet cheeks? I wanna keep you down.”

I smile. “I wouldn’t mind it for twenty minutes or so.”

His hand covers his chest. “Wow.”

I grin, thinking I just pulled off some naughty talk and he laughs.

“Tales, twenty minutes is for teenage boys and married men if their wives are lucky. I gotta come at least once and get my cardio in. Forty-five minute minimum for this ride.”

“Is that so?” I laugh as I lie across his chest.

“It is. I swear. Scouts honor and all that good stuff. You wanna try it out?”

“I do, but I think you have about ten minutes in you before you fall asleep.”

“Not gonna lie, I’m feeling tired as fuck.”

“Then go to sleep.”

He looks at me more seriously now, fighting to stay awake. “I really, really like you, Tales.”

“I really, really like you, too.”

“I really do, though. I’m not kidding around.” His eyes close for a minute, and I see him fighting sleep before he half opens his eyes and smiles. “Emerald City. I wanna live there, you know.”

“Yeah, I kind of like Care-a-lot better.”

“I care-a-lot about you, Tales. Never hurt you.” His eyes close. “Never.”

I watch him sleep for a long time. I just lie with my head on his chest and watch him.

I would pinch myself, but I know it’s not a dream. I know, when I leave here, he is going on tour with all those … women, like … I grab my phone and look at Twitter. @lauriesuz, @rhik1986, @pitjada, @harleygirl105, @daydeamin_nerd, @mamabear824, @melissaq824 @TiltheLastpage, @NEPatriots4ever,@AmyD159, @xsandyra, @momsnaughtyplay, @Fallowill79, @mambrum78, @hwngirl109, @tcoleman1210, @richellgg, @CasBraithwaite, @rholub1, @melissagratton1, @ajsbookreviews…

I can’t keep looking at all the women’s tweets, women who would do anything—including seducing a sexy, talented, half-drugged, and injured rock star by giving him oral sex in a Miami mansion—to try to gain his attention and affections. All those women who … are just like me.

I could never compete.

Not ever.

He groans and moves beneath me. I am sure I am making him uncomfortable. Even though I would like to stay like this for as long as I possibly can, I move so he can rest and recover because Memphis Black is about to become a rock legend of epic proportions.

My eyes travel down his body and I sigh. Definitely epic proportions.

I take my phone and click on the mail icon, trying to distract myself. I enter my email information, log in, and find thirty-eight emails. One is in response to an ad I answered. The subject reads, ‘When can you start?’

I read through the message and smile. It’s a paid gig, twelve weeks dancing with a traveling dance company. They also offer me an instructor position at one of their schools when the tour is over. The more students I have, the more I make.

I keep reading and see that they are very impressed with the fact that I attended Julliard and offer me a thirty thousand dollar a year position with health care and the possibility of retirement, should they decide to keep me past the six month mark.

I respond immediately since the email was dated three days ago.

With thirty thousand dollars, I can afford to get a bigger apartment for my mother and me as long as I ride the train into the city every day, and I will. I will do it because I take responsibility for my actions, even if I can’t ever divulge my darkest secret, my biggest sin.

I wake up, seeing Mads looking at me funny, and not funny as in ha, ha either. She looks kind of pissed. I look around for Tally, who is curled up at the foot of the bed in a little ball, sound asleep. Crap, I fell asleep in their room.

“Don’t be like him, Memphis,” Madison says quietly.

“Huh?”

“Like Dad.”

“You serious right now, Mads?” I’m beyond pissed right now and in some serious fucking pain. Then I sit up quietly and shake the urge to pat POW! She’s got to be drained, too.

Mads puts her finger over her lips, telling me to be quiet and nods to the door.

Begrudgingly, I walk out and stop when she walks out the door.

“Why was the door locked?” She sneers.

“How the hell do I know?” I ask.

“She deserves more. She is kind and—”

“Why don’t you just ask me what it is you’ve already got concocted up in that head, Mads?”